YTA for talking about your kids as if they are objects.

You seem to have a lot of insecurities and issues that need to be addressed. Like it or not at some point your children are going to go out into the world. Wouldn't it be better that they start to learn about the outside world while with family who care the most about their safety and wellbeing. They are your husband's family. They may be different than your parents but it doesn't make them worse and your parents better (sorry to break that to you).

I get waiting until the 2mo is older but for the older child, loosen the noose and let her spend time with different family members and have different world experiences. It's great for her development and good for you too.