I didn’t read your other post, but I wanted to share my thoughts. What I have to say is generic and applies to a broader audience and circumstances. Here we go.

Nobody misses anybody, people miss how people made them feel. Relationships are usually done blindfolded, you ignore who they are as a person and focus on how you made each other feel. Once a person starts to realize what kind of person that person actually is, that’s when they cut the relationship off. Here’s the kicker, it was her that ended it. The person that gets dumped wasn’t paying attention to what was on the other side of that blindfold, they were too focused on the crazy feelings love has to offer. The more you ignore the other side the more hurt you feel when the relationship ends. Life moves on though, and sure she might enjoy things about you, but if it doesn’t work for one person then it doesn’t work at all. A lot of people expect that their feelings should be inferior and the relationship should continue because “I love you,” when those people are actually shitty because they don’t consider the other person as an actual person. That’s where the expression “if you love her, let her go” comes from. When a failed relationship drags on, it’s because one doesn’t want to hurt the other and in the end it causes more damage. Since it ended, it ended for a reason and you have no say in it. She’s saying this stuff to lessen the hurt you feel because you’re being selfish. She doesn’t owe you anything. What needs to happen is accept the fact that both of you felt what you felt for one another, and you need to accept that those feelings didn’t last for her. If you respect those feelings then you two will have a mutual respect for one another forever. If emotional manipulation for ones gain continues, then it’s unhealthy. You two will continue to learn who the other person actually is and if you can compromise with that, because that’s what love is; compromise. If any relationship drags on in an unhealthy way, then you’ll become somebody you’re not.

I opened up a rabbit hole within my own personal philosophy to write this and I could go on forever. I started strong and by the end I know I was rambling, so I hope it makes sense the whole way through. The key take away from this is to learn discipline on how you approach relationships. You need to grow from these things so if and probably when it happens again, you can look at it in a way that will help you accept why it couldn’t work out. This relationship ended on a good and reasonable note and that should be appreciated.

• It starts with sexual attraction (99% of the time)
• Once an acquaintance is formed, two people will show the traits that would make them seem attractive.
• If those traits are found attractive to one another then you begin being more open with one another.
• Being open with someone tells them why you are the way you are, not who you are.
• You are who you are for your behavior, which is usually something a person doesn’t look at themselves from another persons perspective.
• Both people in a relationship have the same job of perceiving that person, because new behaviors will emerge as you become more comfortable.
• If one person doesn’t like your behavior and ends it, that’s that. If you liked their behavior, then that’s too bad. It’s tough, but that how it is.
• If a person doesn’t see it as “how it is,” they begin to emotionally manipulate the other that the relationship should work out because of my perception and feelings for you.
• This is immediately considered selfish, maybe expressing you’re feeling ONCE in a letter to them or something is okay.
• If you feel a way about a person, you should never expect that those feeling are the same feeling those person feels for you. They obviously had feelings for you, people will never forget the way people made them feel.
• When a person is selfish and tries to get the other person to stay in the relationship, they might agree to work it out based on those feeling they have for you.
• This is unhealthy for the person agreeing to try because they already knew deep down the relationship wasn’t for them. It’s unhealthy for the person dragging the other back in because they tend to ignore their responsibility of self reflection, and understanding some of their behavior isn’t ideal and working on changing that behavior, which ain’t easy, it’s always easy to point where someone else was wrong, and even if you weren’t wrong there is always somewhere you could have done better.
• If the person doesn’t change, they drive a bigger wedge in the opportunity of having that mutual respect for one another.
• Mutual respect grows as both people adjust not being with each other anymore.
• The feelings will become memories, and sometime later in life they’ll think of those memories, and sometimes they’ll feel the fire in the hearts.
• If a relationship is dragged out and those “compromises” aren’t made, either they’ll die together as an unhappy couple or the relationship will end on a bad note.
• If it ends on a bad note, and when they think of those good memories and feel that fire in their heart later in life, that’s when they’ll self reflect.
• Instead of them thinking positively about that person because of mutual respect, they now have to feel regret for losing that person because of their behavior they weren’t paying attention to. Blaming others while they weren’t looking at where to improve.