NTA. I’m in a similar situation except my best friend came out when we were 18. We stayed best friends because I didn’t care he was gay (it wasn’t a surprise) but eventually he confessed he was in love with me. Still, he was my friend. I didn’t feel the same way but I didn’t try to distance myself. After that he went off the deep end. He was obsessed, would text me at least once a month with an essay that basically boiled down to “are you sure you’re not gay? Are you sure nothing will happen between us?” To which I always replied: no, I’m not gay. It’s not happening. When school was coming to an end he was literally begging me to have sex with him, just once. Still no. Anyway that was about 10 years ago, I had pretty much forgotten it and obviously moved on with my life. He messaged me last year, we chatted on/off a little bit for a few weeks until one Saturday night around 1am (I assume he was drunk) he sent me 16 short, individual texts like “it’s not my fault I want you” “poor me for having these feelings” etc etc. We hadn’t spoken in 10 years dude, come on.

So I guess the moral of this anecdote is that it’s on them to work through their feelings. Even if you give him the rejection he’s looking for, it won’t matter unless he works through his feelings himself. Don’t let him put that on you.