Have you ever heard of the fearful-avoidant attachment style?

If you don’t, I’ll paste an excerpt here: “Individuals with fearful avoidant attachment are a combination of the preoccupied and dismissive-avoidant styles of insecure attachment. They believe they are unlovable and also don't trust other people to support and accept them. Because they think others will eventually reject them, they withdraw from relationships.

At the same time, however, they strongly desire intimacy because the acceptance of others helps them feel better about themselves.

As a result, their behavior may be confusing to friends and romantic partners; they may encourage closeness at first and then emotionally or physically retreat when they start to feel vulnerable in the relationship.”

If this sounds like you, you may want to dig deeper into it and find ways to help yourself through them. Good luck.