I don't suffer depression , for all intents I am also her care taker as well, half the time she's unable to cope with life.

This has ended up with her working at an easy job once or twice a week and me being the main bread winner in a high stress high paid job.

The relationship in general is quite good other then the fact she can be very aggressive and use language that is hurtful if I question her behavior that is hurtful .

We have been to therapy and I've learnt how not to be personally offended by her personal attacks but it seems she hasn't changed much z but I have. Now when she gets mad I will respond with kindness and patience and talk her down .

It has resulted in less self harm from her but, so that's good. I really wish she wouldn't use such harsh language on me when I bring up something that is important to me such as being able to hold her without her flinching away if my hand even moves a little.

Was going to end this years ago but due to economic constraints I couldn't escape. Well now that is not the case , and I worry that if she continues behaving like this I will say goodbye .