I didn’t miss that portion.
What I’m trying to convey is how easy it is to have years, even decades of meh sex, thinking that’s just how you experience sex. Then one day you can’t do it anymore.
Or you have years of good to ok sex that became meh sex after pregnancy, kids, stress, menopause, etc. and you find you just can’t do it anymore.
If the subject was dropped, she probably wouldn’t have started questioning her sexual orientation. But, since her lack of desire became an issue, she started feeling broken and trying to figure out what was wrong with her…..because something must be, right?
Ask a person who has never experienced sex as awesome what sexual attraction feels like. Ask someone who no longer finds sex pleasurable what sexual attraction feels like.
Sexual attraction doesn’t guarantee sex will always be awesome and highly pleasurable.
It’s confusing as hell and I completely understand OP’s wife feeling asexual NOW. My guess is she never questioned her sexual orientation until her sexual experience changed and became an issue for OP.