I don't want to sound like an asshole, but I might.
Anyone else ever had friends that turned out not as good as you always thought they were?
Maybe it's you.
From what I understand, one of my best friends was raised by narcissists, which is why I am here, to try and understand.
He is hard to have as a friend. He doesn't talk a lot, like you say you don't. He doesn't open up easily, he doesn't let himself be vulnerable, he doesn't allow me to help him because he's so used to doing everything alone he doesn't need or want anyone to do it with him.
there is a lot of stuff social wise that he doesn't understand, and while it doesn't seem to bother him at all and he lives a seemingly happy life, it's clear to me, and sometimes to others, that he struggles.
He doesn't reach out to anyone for anything, regardless of the medium. His communication skills can be lacking sometimes which is very frustrating. He gets invited places because he comes with me.
He's a challangeing friend to have. I think I could safely say our friendship is different to every other friendship I have. If I don't try with him, he will fall off the map.
Maybe it's you OP. Maybe it's your friends. I don't know, but I wouldn't be so quick to pass the blame. If you never open up, people won't ever see value in having you around.
Sometimes people raised differently to the norm are hard to be friends with, and in a world full of "normal" people, sometimes people raised by Ns are a lot of excess effort to have and keep as friends.