Did y’all grow up feeling like you were always spied on?

May I suggest a tactic for that, 'The Queen's Duck" : https://bwiggs.com/notebook/queens-duck/

It stems from the development of the game Battlechess, where a dev knew an overly nitpicky/micromanaging manager would try to find something to nitpick about, even if there wasn't anything. So the dev intentionally put in a duck, sort of fitting but also kind of notably out of place. Later the manager went over the work, approved everything, but then said ".. but take out the duck." The dev was already ready to do that, and the game shipped.

I would sometimes leave obvious 'Ducks' about for my nparent to 'find'. They'd complain, I'd 'fix it', and then we didn't have to play the she-has-to-search-for-something and then-I-have-to-argue-its-fine game.

/r/raisedbynarcissists Thread Parent