It sounds like you're dealing with a difficult situation in your relationship with your ex. It can be challenging and confusing when a relationship ends, especially after being together for a long time and having children together.
It's important to remember that everyone is different and that everyone has their own fears and concerns when it comes to relationships. It's possible that your ex is feeling scared and unsure about whether he wants to try a relationship again, and that he needs time to think about his feelings and what he wants.
One thing you can do is to try to communicate openly and honestly with your ex about your own feelings and needs. It's important to let him know how you're feeling and to express your desire to work through any fears or concerns that he might have. It's also important to listen to his perspective and to try to understand why he's feeling scared and unsure.
It can also be helpful to set boundaries in your relationship and to make sure that both partners are getting their needs met. This might involve setting aside specific times for each partner to have alone time or space, or finding ways to compromise.
Ultimately, the decision about what to do in your relationship is up to you and your ex. It's important to communicate openly and honestly and to try to find a way to make the relationship work for both of you, if that's what you both want. Take care of yourself.