Hey friend. Wall of text incoming.
This is my first time posting in this sub, but I have been an amphetamine user since I was 14 years old (I'm 31 now). At one point in my early 20s, I would take approximately 120mg of adderall daily, though now I try and limit my intake to 75mg. This is a daily habit, only missing doses on days which I could not get my hands on any.
I have a love/hate relationship with amphetamines, and their effects have evolved over the years. One would think that after 17 years of abusing amphetamines, the user would be totally brain-fried. In all sincerity, I'm doing ok.
My drug abuse has taken its toll, don't get me wrong. I suffer from TMJD, have a couple fractured teeth (due to years of bruxism), and deal with mild/moderate anxiety on a daily basis. It can be difficult at times talking with strangers or speaking in front of a group, and sometimes I'll experience a full-blown panic attack.
All of that being said, amphetamines haven't ruined my life. I have close relationships with all of my friends and family, I am a fantastic performer at work (Adderall: Employee of the Month in a pill), and my most recent physical exam revealed that my heart is healthy, blood pressure is normal, and my cholesterol is low. HOWEVER, I have developed a few tics over the years. Some of these can be attributed to TMJD, while others I believe are negative consequences of long-term amphetamine abuse. It sucks that I have them, yeah, but I refuse to allow them to negatively impact my life. If people notice them, I tell them straight up that I have tics, and most people understand.
Now, all of that being said, your best bet is to kill your habit. Fortunately for you, going cold turkey from amphetamines isn't going to cause you to have seizures like benzo withdrawal could. You'll have zero motivation, will probably be agitated for a few days, and will sleep a lot. Fortunately this temporary. You may have done some long-term damage, but through hard work and dedication, you can bring the old you back. You don't NEED the amphetamines to get through the day.
This is my primary account, and I usually pop in on reddit a few times per day. If there's ANYTHING you'd like to talk about or ask, please do not hesitate to message me. I do not judge, I do not belittle, and I will try my best to answer any questions that ANYBODY may have for a long-term amphetamine user. Life doesn't have to be so serious, and it rarely is. Relax, but take action. You truly can be the guy or girl who has motivation, passion, and happiness without the meds.