My MIL has been hiding her true self from me for years. In fact, I make her uncomfortable, because I disagree with her, and when she tries to escalate, I disregard her anger and only focus on the words. A few times she stormed off in a fit while we were drinking and smoking weed together. I just remained calm. I also once told her I didn't feel comfortable with how she was driving (100 mph down a 60 listening to rap music). I could see her rage. She said she was going to drive however she wanted and if I didn't like it I could drive myself or not go, so I opted to not go and stay home with my wife. She started screaming and calling me selfish to my wife, and pointing at me, so I smiled and looked behind me as if she were pointing at someone behind me when it was clear that she wasn't just to annoy her.
Then she threw a bunch of boxes on her curb and called my wife, telling her to "collect her shit".
The stuff didn't belong to my wife at all.
So I knock on the door to inform her that I'd miss her company and that the stuff doesn't belong to us and how its unfortunate things aren't working out, but I wish her luck.
So she had inner anger, but was hiding it and she said things "need to change" and that I "don't take her seriously".
She took it as an apology (it was supposed to be a farewell)and invited me in for coffee, so I had some and she started "explaining her boundaries for me" about how I need to "stop teacher her daughter to hate her" and I need to start "lending her my car and driving her places."
I put down the coffee and started to explain that her coffee was great, but it wasn't THAT great.
She told me I wasn't taking her seriously and that this was the "worst apology she has ever received."
I corrected her, by noting that and apology hadn't taken place and I had just come to inform her that none of the boxes outside had things containing stuff that belonged to Brittany.
I started lighting a joint when she threw her coffee.
I then started smoking and said, "oh let me get that for you."
I walked to the kitchen, where she keeps her towels, but I suddenly did a 90 degree spontaneous turn and walked out the kitchen door and to the car. Then I put the bud out (public) and let my wife drive me home.
Then I got an email from MIL asking if I was ready to apologize.
That was 3 years ago. Didn't respond back.