Hold on. Back it up. I this ties in well with a fundamental problem in our society; why do we need goals? All our lives we're given an idea of what success is, how you'll be happy if/when you achieve success, and how success can only be achieved through personal short and long term goals. Now, I'm not saying to just abandon all hope and live in a nihilist mindset, constantly haunted by idea of nothing having purpose. But I think that sometimes just the concept of goals themselves can put too much pressure on just living; you can get so focused on "having goals" that It just sucks the fun out of regular activities. Could it be possible that you don't find any joy in creating things because you're so focused on trying to find fulfillment that it overshadows the simplistic aesthetic of the activity itself? The act of agenda-seeking ends up completely dominating any chance you have of just enjoying what you're doing. So how do you out all this nonsensical babble into action? Just take a week, and try to care less. Just do things that feel good, only because they feel good. And I know that's easy to say coming from someone who's not trying to make money in that field, but maybe you need to do some real soul searching on what actually makes you happy. Just take that week to feel out activities; don't worry about making money, or completing goals. Just do it cause it feels right. Eventually you'll feel something right.