Wow..you just defined one of the major problems I’ve been having for the last 5+ years. Wow.

It’s just..odd, because I shouldn’t be this way but being ‘touch starved’ caused me to be sort of pessimistic toward my family and some of my friends. It’s been this way ever since freshmen year of high school and I thought it was ‘just a phase’ or whatever but apparently its something much bigger than that. I’ve never had a girlfriend, had sex or any sort of intimacy with anyone. Now, I’m not in the best shape and I’m just decent looking but that has contributed toward my low self esteem.

It sucks. Because even if I get the feeling that I need (I.E. finding a relationship) I fear that because I’ve never experienced it I’ll become clingy to keep that feeling to make me feel better and not the other person.

It sucks. Because I now don’t love my family as much anymore as I used to and I can’t figure out why. Same thing with friends.

Sorry, that’s long and doesn’t make sense at some points. It’s 3AM and I haven’t slept in 18 hours.