I have a similar pessimism that rears its ugly head on occasion, but an exercise that I try to do is ask myself for precise examples of the "harm" or "leeching" that someone or something is doing to me. If I can't think of specific examples, that are literal, not figurative... then I slowly start to come around and realize it's more just my mind making something negative, possibly influenced by my upbringing, or by negative experiences I've had in life. It can be like wearing sunglasses all the time -- everything you see just seems so "dark" until we can learn to take the glasses of, or can adjust our vision to account for the darkness.

In regard to the government, and job slavery, etc., a person could think of it like this: I go to work... I get paid money, I give some of it back as taxes. When I left my drive way in my car, the only reason I could get to work was because there were roads built for me, by someone - the government. The only reason I didn't die on the way was because someone - the government - installed safety measures, like traffic lights, speed limit signs, rules and regulations for us all to follow so we don't die. On my way home, I decide to check out a couple movies and a book at the library. They were free, because - the government - provided funding for them. I'm free to vote, but that's not even possible without - the government - providing funding in order to mail out ballots or to pay people to count votes. If I chop my arm off in a freak chainsaw accident, without - the government - funding emergency services and 911 call centers and operators, I would definitely die. I couldn't post on this website right now, for free, and say whatever I wanted, if not for - the government (figuratively) - and all the other users donating money to keep the site running. I could go on forever and ever, but it's an interesting exercise to do... it's not finished yet, though.

Last step, replace all instances of - the government - with me, myself, or I. Because that is where the money came from to begin with. So how can I hate that I built a road for myself or that I saved myself from dying? :) Who is leeching off who?

I hate to say this part, it makes me cringe because I don't want to make anyone feel guilty, and I have received public assistance in the past myself, actually, but it could be an eye-opener: who pays for a person who doesn't work? It's a bit hypocritical for someone who doesn't want to work because they don't want the government to leech off them, to simultaneously be leeching off the people who do work and pay taxes. Someone pays for those who do not work. Lots of someones; every person who works and pays taxes. There are lots of people that legitimately need the help, don't get me wrong, I am ALL for public assistance/welfare... I'm just saying that anyone using it, or not paying their own way in life, are basically leeching off everyone else, except for the government. So they aren't "sticking it to the man" (i.e. the government) by not working. They are "sticking it to their friends, family, and neighbors." I dunno... I hope that doesn't come across super negative, I don't mean it that way at all; I just think sometimes we could all use a reminder from a different point of view. It helps me, at least.

Also, maybe there is a cool part-time job or volunteer gig out there for you that would kill some of that boredom? Like helping out at an animal shelter or something? The "chaos" of a place like that might be a kind of excitement that your brain needs to jump start itself? Also, getting outside of ourselves, and doing good for another (the cute animals in this case) is often satisfying on a metaphysical and higher self/soul level. It is a great kind of "fuel" for the engine, and it also builds a (figurative) veil of protection around a person... so that the little things that once seemed so horrible and depressing, don't cross their mind anymore, or don't seem nearly as important. Trust me, I have been a house-bound person on again and off again, so I know both worlds. I have even been homeless before. I know sometimes it feels like there's no light at the end of the tunnel, or that you can't even find the friggin' tunnel in the first place, or all the signs are in backwards hieroglyphics, but there is always some positive in everything... even if it takes a while for us to find it, or to "feel" it. Sometimes the longer the wait, the better the ride. (Something I came up with at an amusement park once, while contemplating my life and waiting in the looogest line ever for the best roller-coaster I'd ever been on. :-)

Sorry for long rant! I got carried away.