What is your definition of brainwashing and where would you consider to be a place to have no brainwashing?

I agree with you that the word brainwashing is used too easily. I usually avoid it in conversation cause it often feels like a way to dismiss others like "your points are not valid because you're brainwashed"

East Asian countries are much more collectivist compared to western countries. I don't consider collectivism any more "brainwashy" than individualism.

An interesting fact is that this is even reflected in paintings. Western painting are much more likely to focus on a person compared to eastern paintings. Meanwhile, eastern paints have much more focus on nature and everyone is more or less drawn the same in the "we are one" sort of way

It's a cultural difference to me but some believe collectivism is brainwashing but not individualism