Look I know I have a problem. My problem is I had a bad accident that messed up part of my body and then the guy I was with lied to me and traumatized me with deceit when it was important I see clearly and take care of myself. That guy lived in the same building as the new one. So once it seemed he was ambivalent and dishonest, I became unsettled and anxious. I couldn’t deal with going thru it again and I just wanted to make it easier so I didn’t become extremely depressed abt my original Accident all over again. But I also don’t want to be hostile with someone I’ve made love to because it also reminds me of the original accident. And because I have really worked to create a nurturing environment. Before it went south, those traumatic memories were mostly dormant and now they are flaring up. Last week I was crying abt the accident and I hadn’t done that in a long time. I don’t want to feel anxious and depressed abt something deeply troubling that I’ve worked hard to forget just cus I see my neighbor. I know it’s not exactly normal but I actually am doing a great job of getting this trauma out of me and I don’t want a setback cus I can’t proximally separate myself from the reminders.