I am in my 30s and not only don't want kids, but have had a hysterectomy so I can't. (It was actually a very positive experience and went very well; I digress).

Nonetheless, I still feel so much pressure, though. I feel myself aging, especially since I started going gray (I do color it, though. Some people rock it, I am not there yet). My age makes me so panicky.

I worry that it is too late, and that there isn't anyone good/compatible, still single, and in my area who would want to be with me, and who also doesn't have or want kids. And these fears are what are keeping me from going on the apps. I am really scared that I will either find someone awful, something that doesn't succeed and then I am back where I started (or worse), or no one.

I wish that I had your courage and at-peace-ness, for lack of a better term. Wishing you the best.