Watching this I can think only of a bloody weekend when my two boys went to stay overnight with my in-laws...This was years ago, when they were small. They’d only been at their grandparents’ house for a couple of hours, and I get a phone call. All I can hear on the other end of the line is screaming—my kids AND my in-laws. Adrenaline instantly through the roof. My children are crying and screaming, and I can’t see what’s happening or figure out what in the everloving fuck is going on. All I hear on the other end of the line is chaos. Over the next few minutes I managed to get this story out of the adults on the other end of the line, and lose one of my nine lives: my oldest son (then about 7) was “wrestling with” (aka climbing all over) his grandpa on the living room floor. My youngest son (about 5 years old), was sitting by his grandma on the couch when he suddenly felt the need to take matters into his own hands, as it were, and “protect” his big brother from grandpa. My littlest boy calmly picked up the nearest item to hand, summoned the powers at his tiny disposal, and rained hell forth on any being that dared threaten HIS big brother. The aforementioned yeeted item happened to be a whetstone about the size of a remote control...which sailed past his grandpa...and hit his big brother absolutely square in the head, smack between his eyes, an inch behind the hairline at his forehead. My little man had the goods to smite his enemy, even in pre-k. He may have hit the wrong guy, but he didn’t miss.

My poor oldest kid literally had no idea what hit him. He bled like a stuck pig and got a doozy of a scar but was really no worse for the wear afterward. I managed not to commit any violent crimes of my own that day, and it was the last time my boys went to my in-laws unattended. The end :)