you may have already seen this but I am linking in anyways http://metro.co.uk/2017/03/03/five-year-old-gets-the-same-haircut-as-friend-so-that-his-teacher-wouldnt-be-able-to-tell-them-apart-6485367/

This is a very very prime example of children, they are innocent and don't complicate things. They have nothing but open hearts and minds. The only way a child can be hateful is if they are fed to be so. Your children are a bit older though, pre teens basically but I still think in this day and age they probably are still open minded. Sexuality and Gender Identity has become a huge talk among-st this generation because we are learning and understanding it all better each year. Sit down with your kids and open up, they are old enough to understand. Try not to feel uncomfortable or refuse to answer any questions they may ask because that's a sign of them wanting to understand. As for what they should call you, tell them you're still their parent but the word "mom" makes you feel badly about yourself because it's a word to describe "woman" again they would understand, maybe allow them to come up with a name to call you? Something they would be comfortable using. Good luck! I really do hope it all works out!