Top-Priority Message To Commander: Paradigmfusion

From: The Federal Security Agency


It has been brought to our attention that you, Commander Paradigmfusion have been spreading pro-Thargoid propaganda on behalf of the Thargoid menace. Under the Federal Wartime Criminal Punishment Act of 3303, you are in breach of the following:

  • Spreading Thargoid propaganda.

  • Not firing on a enemy vessel during a time of war.

  • And using three "!!!" in you're Elitreddit post while also not featuring a Asp infront of things.

You have 24 hours to surrender yourself to any Federal Starport in human-inhabited space so you can answer for your crimes in a Federal Court of Law. We take great pleasure in telling you that failure to surrender yourself within the next 24 hours or any attempts to flee will result with you being marked as a Federal Fugative at large and having a two million credit bounty placed on your head at which time Federal bounty hunters will be dispatched to terminate you. Any attempts to contact the Thargoids, spread Thargoid propaganda, engage in further pro-Thargoid actions or an attempt to run away like a little girl to the Alliance or Empire for protection will result with a encounter from one of our Farragut Class Battlecruisers after it preforms it's once-a-week jump. Please stay within 500 lightyears of the Sol system.

With regards, The Federal Secuirty Agency.

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/r/EliteDangerous Thread Parent Link - i.redd.it