Who's she manipulating and acting for now,
About one line before that, she KNEW her husband was on the way, and she TOLD him taht she would discuss it with him. Then she left and told him what she did. She's manipulating him. Why even mention god? Take this seriously.
he's also said she doesn't want to talk to her brother again, as evident by the whole phone shouting match, but you just conveniently leave that out
Let's review that shall we?
I then called my brother and with a little less calm voice I said if he ever mentioned our parents again I will cut him off like I cut them off. He tried to reason they were still family. I lost my patience. I concluded there was no way I was ever going to make him understand what I went through. I ended the discussion with this seething, disgusted, "I hate you."
No where in this does she say any of the following: I will never speak to him again. I told him that he can never contact me again. I told him he was uninvited to the wedding. I told him that what he told my fiancee is completely unacceptable and has caused a huge issue for me. All I get is a bunch of crap and I hate you.
And here's the most important part, and the whole reason for my post, she hasn't communicated JACK SHIT to her husband. Who has already tried to reach out to her. Now she has cut ties with someone, and not told her partner about it. Not discussed her plan of attack with him. Not given him any support and has not saught any support from him. Bad move.
You are advising the OP to make a bad move. You say she has an emotional trigger with her parents that causes a meltdown, what do you say when she says this:
As of right now, my brother and I have a good relationship. ... You see, after I cut my parents off my brother would sometimes mention them off-hand, despite me sternly telling him I want to know nothing about them; probably as a way to get me back in their "family unit," I think. After one such instance of this, I lost my patience and told him in no uncertain terms I will never be contacting them
She openly admits she readily had to deal with it and talk with it, and not completely melt down.