After reading this post I do realise I am very selfish... and I suppose most of the problems are my fault. So if you had to both change a lot about your role in the relationship, and also had to reconnect while doing self reflection and having self doubt, how would you do it? :)

ps. I helped out SO MUCH to clean that house! I simply couldn't help anymore because the others just didn't care enough to fix it up. I am also really nervous about his new household falling into the same pattern of letting things become dirty and ruined because they are lazy, but he has a new housemate who has instilled a more positive approach to household cleanliness.