My colleague [27MTF] is making some people uncomfortable at work since her transition. How can I let her know without hurting her feelings?

…right cause throwing around the “terf” and speaking on behalf of this topic as if it is some highly scholarly field that only the finest of educated individuals can understand will make someone see your POV. Terf is always a confusing term to me as well- you’re assuming someone identifies with modern feminist theory which is pretty radicalized, most people who are a bit unsure of trans people are likely not modern feminists, so the whole term is completely inapplicable.

Anyway, pushing away the idea that it is utter nonsense and impossible that one believes they are trans in hopes of gaining more access to women is entirely a shoe-in. There are many people who regret transitioning and did so out of grasping for straws after feeling some bits of dysphoria or discomfort with themselves. The touching and inappropriate boundaries cannot be entirely attested to someone going through “2nd puberty”- this person may very well be experiencing and forming their idea of womanhood, but they did not forget common personal boundaries, like it’s not okay to touch someone without their consent. Or that it’s rude to make generalizable comments like “we’re so ditsy” implying who they’re with is too. This person is just being wildly inappropriate, rude, and unprofessional in a work setting. No one can say for sure about the validity of their trans identity- OP should support them with it of course unless proven otherwise, but this 100% dismissal of skepticism because “Americans or others are just not educated enough” is so fucking cringe. It’s called critical thinking, we’re allowed to have it last time I checked.

/r/relationship_advice Thread Parent