All of this to say that I rely heavily on self-assessment first and foremost, and simply use the opinions of others as a mirror to gauge my self-assessment abilities. Most people who put you down are doing so to change the power dynamics and force you into submission, but there's still a small yet significant portion of the time where their words would actually provide you with great pathways of improvement.

I get your logic. I should pay attention to critical issues that are consistent with my self awareness. I have done that and now I am in a situation where I need to make drastic improvements and that is why I made the choice and made this post.

I am at a point in my life where I could either break away or remain the same person that people want me to be. People in my social circles know about my personal challenges because we share friends with my brother who claims to be "supporting" me. To put things into perspective one of the girls that I was hitting on was into me but the more she started realising how dependent I was on this person and how this person just has a need to control everything she lost interest to the point where she could not even enter the house in which we live in. She just stayed outside and waited for her friend to finish talking to him.

Another girl randomly asked me why I am so needy when they came over. He is one of those people who wants to make it known who is calling the shots and is very controlling. Not the modest of people you will ever meet and he will never admit to wrongs. He thinks I am failure so he has to do charity work which is holding him back on his goals in life so he bickers about it and puts me down but in reality he is the one that has been holding me back.