First, I love your perspective.
The problem I have with feminism is that so much of it is academic psittacism. I absolutely loathe the application of intersectional feminism because it has emphasized identity politics while completely disregarding constructive criticism. What began as a motion to increase the diversity of thought has turned into a McCarthy-esque oppression olympics where ideas are silenced in order to apply a frightening orthodoxy that inspires campaigns of fear instead of lively debate. Simply put, we are now crusading to vanquish paper tigers instead of making actual process.
My mother is a perfect example of this. She was born in 1954. She recalls opening up a newspaper to apply for jobs only to be reminded that she was looking at the men's column rather than the women's column. This, she thought, was an absolute outrage. She got to where she was today by working hard and, even today, she's one of a handful of extremely senior female executives working in industrials. Her hardest task right now is actually finding competent women who want to work in industrials because the hours are long and the work is extremely arduous even in an entirely corporate setting. The insane thing about all of this is that she doesn't believe she's ever been discriminated against since at least the early 1980s when women burst open the doors to boardrooms. Despite the fact that she was a trailblazer, I can only see the outrage of social justice warriors now: "She's an anti-feminist! She's just a tool of the patriarchy! She got where she is because of white privilege!" She came to this country as a political refugee from an oppressive communist government and had to endure being refused service at Walmart because people were suspicious of Slavs who didn't speak English well but, whatever, white privilege right?
What I really hate, however, is the whole concept of privilege and the whole cis gender identity movement. I'm gay so bear with me as I explain why. I'm the kind of person that you'd never be able to tell is gay. I was a NCAA athlete. I dated girls in high school. I don't lisp or have any conventionally gay mannerisms. I nearly got a commission in the army. I'm as "cisgender straight-passing" as they come. But when I first tried to come out in 2008, six of my classmates broke two of my ribs with a bat. I woke up unconscious with a black eye covered in urine. I was so shaken that I never even reported it to the police because, I thought, if this is how my classmates react imagine what my parents would think.
This all took place on a liberal arts campus in New England.
Yet despite all of this, I'm still consistently told how much I benefit from whatever feminist/gender/racial theory alphabet soup is fashionable today. Most of these activists have never had anything happen to them. I had to be admitted to critical care. What I find absurd about writing this is that I have to justify my pain to these insane social justice warriors. I feel like punching a wall when I'm told how privileged I am.
So until we start driving for a society that recognizes responsibility and actual gender equality, I can't support modern feminism. Instead, I'll have to defer to Camille Paglia.
edit: Sorry, this was a super intense personal response to your claim haha.