Even if I did want to file charges against her mother, would it help?

I realize I was taken advantage of. Though at what cost? Statistically speaking you're most likely to be sexually assaulted by someone you know. With it comes a whole bundle of issues if you seek prosecution. Family gets involved, friends...They might not agree with exactly what happened and they will blame you, blame the other person etc...I love my friend dearly, so much that I can just walk away and put this behind me. I wouldn't want her to think any less of her mother, any less of me. Either way I would have lost my friend. It's a shitty realization. Mostly this is why rape victims don't report things. They carry an incredible burden of what ifs and the guilt associated with them.

Yes I was drunk, I tried to stop it, but yeah...that didn't work. I vaguely remember it, but she was on top. I drank a lot, dick still worked.

What really pisses me off is that she just viewed me as a sex object after and never apologized. This woman was supposed to be a "friend". She clearly wasn't as drunk as I was, the least she could have done was talk to me in private to acknowledge what happened and stop with the gestures. Even when I did continue to come over the sexual gestures did not stop and I got uncomfortable and disgusted with her and with myself. Seriously, who the fuck tries to deep throat a beer bottle when someone steps out of the room. I did tell her to stop and she didn't.

But alas I am a man and society will view it as meh, had sex.

Ironically I am a 2L at a law school going into my 3L and I work for at a clinic. I get to see first hand how these cases are dealt with. Yes, I see (female) victims in the same situation that I was in. They're at parties etc, drink too much, he said she said situations. We recently did some work on Title IX with some local universities, and it is even more shocking how those investigations are handled. You do see some cases that make you roll your eyes on the inside, but I believe everyone deserves a chance to be heard and at least give them a benefit of the doubt until everything comes to light. Then you do see cases where people clearly regret it and try to seek damages and really smear someones image / name...

If this was a random stranger who did it, I would be in full vengeance mode...If I was physically injured, I would have been in full vengeance mode.

You do see cases where the victim did not know the attacker, or the where the victim was clearly an unwilling participant and has physical and emotional injuries.

The experience for me is both a negative and a positive. I learned to avoid putting myself in compromising situations. It was a shitty experience, and it was a learning experience, and made me realize a lot of things about others, myself, and the American culture...

I got myself tested, everything came back negative. No STDs, no physical injuries, no major emotional injuries, I am fine. I regret making the decision to stay that night, I regret what happened after, but I learned from it, I grew from it, and I will never make that mistake again.