sadly, you are the only other person I've encountered who has the same attitude toward directly addressing powers of darkness, but you arrived at the conclusion in a different way.
like you, I am spiritually sensitive and probably have the gift of discernment of spirits. I am aware of them a lot. you list the freedom that people have to choose to be under the influence of something like Buddhism, and that evangelism is needed, rather than rebuking the evil out loud which is present in that neighborhood.
what i feel god has shown me is that in line with his omnipresence and authority, and out of respect for his desire that we pray without ceasing, we should ask him to incapacitate them if we're made aware of them. they're always in a way like, "go ahead, make my day," since they love to harass and cause contention, strife, and condemnation. I'm convinced a lot of Christians cause unnecessary trouble for themselves by not learning the lesson you did when setting yourself up to take them on. their focus is not jesus so much as "doing spiritual warfare," and what they mean by that. I only address directly and tell them to leave if they speak to me, put images in my mind, or are in a space they should not be, such as my home or a church building (and even then, it's wise to ask god why they're being allowed access.)
a few years ago I wanted to intercede for someone I dearly love who has started refusing to confess their sins, and their behavior has become increasingly demonic. I googled a few things in desperation, but only saw stories of people attempting to affect deliverance long distance by speaking out loud to things which were not present (effectively summoning the demonic), and they were severely attacked, with visible manifestations that caused them actual physical harm. this seemed like a bad idea to me, since as you mention, the person's will is involved, and god is respectful of that. I asked the lord what to do, and felt he directed me fast. during the fasting, I asked him the root of my friend's problems, and spent the next three hours writing down wounds from childhood, sinful activities, family involvement in occult activities, etc which allowed evil spirits access. I was stunned, but god loves it when we want to intercede, and listen to his leading. he then led me to pray about each thing - to acknowledge the sins of his and his family, the need for god's forgiveness, and the justice of allowing the affliction. I asked him to forgive, and to give Satan notice to vacate as the forgiveness is granted and my friend is brought to his senses. I have had to stand firm in that intercession, but my friend is now seeing the end of his bondage.
please share any thoughts you might have. I've read your comments before and always enjoy your insights...