Thank you kind stranger! For context - My wife and I separated in February of last year and are very nearly divorced (court date is next week). The issue - I've been with my current partner just under a year and have been living with her since early March this year. When we first moved in there was some tensions around things like household chores which was to be expected. However some issues, that I can only describe as jealousy or insecurity, started appearing. For example receiving or sending messages on my phone could quite upset her. In the spirit of compromise I began to change my digital habits, being a quite connected person I could see that could be a little annoying to someone who wasn't so I started having device free time slots, putting laptops, phones etc away in the evening. This made me feel a little isolated from some friends who I mainly keep in touch with in this manner. I gradually re-introduced a bit of device use to times I thought were not problematic - eg not at dinner or when we are spending time together. One morning she freaked out because I was exchanging silly drawings with a work colleague of mine - he drew a pretend map of where he now lives on a mountain, I sent some squiggles back. Really daft stuff - I thought. She went nuts about it saying was weird and couldn't understand it. She insinuated there might be something 'going on' between me and my friend because I once said that Ben Affleck was particularly buff as Batman (?!?!?!?!). I walked away from that conversation, something I rarely do, because I was feeling infuriated. I never raise my voice or say words in anger but on this occasion I just couldn't feel calm. I walked to my office and didn't ease the door closed. I didn't slam it but it made a door noise. She came in and screamed at me. "Fuck you, you walk away I've smashed up your whisky glasses. You think you win? Well now we are even" and other stuff in this vein. I calmly told her this behaviour is unacceptable. Turns out she hadn't smashed anything but had thrown some stuff around. We temporarily resolved this incident through communication. I am a massive believer in this. She acknowledges she has anger issues and gets cross with small things and kicks of and stomps away if she thinks something is going on. An example is once I had a timer running on my phone for some cooking, I looked at it during a movie and she stormed off saying "fine just talk to your friends then" - stuff like that. She also shouts and swears if the house isn't tidy to her liking. I clean the kitchen daily and vacuum once a week on Saturdays but feel it is never enough if it randomly annoys her. I find it hard to be around negative moods over small things. I've started my masters this year and she has seemed to be jealous over the time I had to spend essay writing and put me in quite stressful situations as I had deadlines approaching. At the moment I feel like the best approach is to not use any devices and to clean the house before she gets home every day to not set her off. I would rather that than the negativity but this also makes me feel a bit sad and trapped. She has promised to work on her issues and sees a therapist. What I am having trouble with is I don't think the shouting at me and throwing things is every acceptable. If it had been the other way around, I am a fairly large bloke, it could easily be considered abusive. I also don't know if the adjustments I am making to try and not annoy her are reasonable or not? I feel like it is my fault and I have messed up and done wrong all the time. One last example. I accidentally missed two doses of a medication I take primarily for anxiety. It is an SSRI and as such can cause withdrawal symptoms if you miss a dose. Two days in a row due to incidents at home I forgot to take my tablets. For me these symptoms are a fuzzy feeling of vagueness, cold sweats, disorientation and an inability to concentrate coupled with emotional outbursts. Crying in the work toilets kind of thing. Not pleasant. When I realised what was happening (it sneaks up on you) I let her know how it would affect me (I wrote an email and explained in person) and that she need not worry but I would require some patience while the meds balanced out again. I'm annoying enough at the best of times so I felt a warning that I might be vague and distracting was only fair. She accepted this and offered to cook dinner. I was drinking a cup of tea and realised I was drinking from a Ramones cup and had a Ramones shirt on. This amused me for some reason so I took a photo and put it on insta/FB. Didn't think much of it and was kind of zoning out on the sofa for a while before I realised she was outside. She had stopped cooking and turned everything off and gone and sat out on the front deck. When I asked what was wrong she said "how can you be having medication issues and posting to FB?" - I found it very hard to understand and explain - as I couldn't see anything to explain. I ended up feeling like I had fucked up again and just apologised. In the light of day this morning I don't think I did anything wrong. But maybe I did? So yeah, I just can't see the wood for the trees, I can't figure out what is reasonable behaviour from me or her. Any external insight would be great. Sorry if this is a bit ramblesome. Still a bit wobbly!