No one wants me. I'll go out, ask girls out directly, not like a robot mind you, I'll mix it up, usually get shot down. Or go to bars and just try to be friendly, take a more patient approach, same thing once I go a step further and ask for a number. Try online (no one ever messages me first so I do after waiting a bit), 1/100 will send a few messages back, but it doesn't go further. Women just don't talk to me on these things. I don't get any feedback. Tinder, OKcuped, POF, even craigslist. All the same story. Plenty of robots seem interested in me though, mostly for a credit card number, but I think I'm wearing this one down and might get her binary number soon. Even though she just keeps repeating herself, she at least responds.
I'll also not try at places, places where I'm focused on other activities, to try to not appear desperate, and live a normal life, like at yoga or spanish group. Nothing ever starts up through being aloof though.
I've changed who I am as a person a lot, for my own reasons, mostly lived as a GGG looking to save the world. Liked shaking people up to do it, so I know I'm not a doormat. Pro exploration, change, and growth. Traveled, went on adventures, climbed mountains, skydived, got my motorcycle license, drove across the country so many times my van blew up :), good times, but I was alone. Lived with a lot of hats. Had various low wage jobs, Was Army, that got me in shape, but still brought nothing. I've been passionate about what I was doing, but it was politics so I'm sympathetic to no one giving a shit about that. It is America. I'm in college to be a machinist and I still work as well. I have no debt and try to invest in the community/people around me, that just draws users, men really are just disposable to women in this world from my experience.
I've been on different forums on here for advice and perspectives. Mens view, women's views, blue pill, red pill, seduction, self improvement, etc.. I've implemented what I could, but the effort to put in so much for women who do nothing has definately become not worth it. The cost benefit in terms of effort is WAY off. My life is stable to myself, I'm happy with who I am and what I've done/do.
I used to have a really possitive attitude and frame about being attractive. I would project positivity, fun, and be fair in an egalitarian manner. I felt like I was a healthy person who brought good things to the world. I made sure of it. How could I not be loved or wanted.
Nope. Irrelevant apparently.
I've now fallen into being depressed about being alone, angry at what I've seen of women, thinking otherwise was just too delusional for me. I'm just not one to favor a misconstrued perception of reality. I have had atleast a couple of relationships, they both cheated on me. A couple of potentials, but they're SOOOO self absorbed, as if they're incapable of talking about anything else but themselves or gossip. They put zero effort in. It's like not being in a relationship, but worse, because there still isn't anyone there who cares enough to know what happened in your day, yet you still get used like a tool for their needs.
At this point today, I've becoming angry, bitter, I simply hate women, especially feminists (they're egalitarian like fox news is fair and balenced). I think women are horrific creatures who use and demean men, women only seem to have bad things to say about men (yes I recognize the hypocrisy of this line considering the post, which is not an accurate representation of my general narrative). I'm constantly reminded about how men are a problem, like how there's a rape culture with men so they need to be told again and again not to rape, like we should tell Muslims again and again to not be terrorist, or Blacks not to be criminals. The bigotry of women runs so deep they usually can't even fathom the bias, and will be in complete denial about being anything but fair, though I can sympathize that much of it appears subtle when you accept the dogmatism of focusing only on the needs of one gender as balance and equality. (I know it's really a mixed bag, and generalizations are unfair, but from my perspective these views are VERY systemic with women. VERY systemic.)
Sadly, thanks to biology, I still have every inclination to be with women regardless. Being a-sexual would be nice, hell I even tried men. I'm open minded and recognised the population distribution favors women till 40. So I gave it a shot, but it's honestly just not my thing. Now I just stay at home, and get high. Hiding my growing resentment til I kill myself, or figure out something, or stumble upon a miracle. But to me, it's obvious that love doesn't exist, just actors acting, so I quit waiting for miracles. I quit believing in women, or caring about their well being. I'm just tired at this point, and all that's left is hate. I'm getting more isolated, getting blown off so much just drains you, and I've pretty much excepted that no one will ever be their for me, so I stopped going out, especially now that I'm in this hole of loneliness, anger, and misery. It's all that's left to do.