[Serious] Children of bad parents, what made them bad parents?

I don't know if my mom was a BAD parent. She certainly loved me, she still does. I believe her intentions were mostly good, but she didn't know how to raise kids.

For 1 she lived with my grandparents, which I guess isn't the worst thing imaginable or anything, but she lived with them until I was 14. She never tried to move out or build a life or anything like that. For quite sometime me, my mother, and my sister all shared a bedroom, which she was basically fine with. I feel like that caused me to have a low standard of living for quite a while.

She was a criminal by trade, sold counterfeit items for a living. Sometimes if she wasn't doing well she'd get a job working in a factory, but mostly she just sold bootleg merchandise, which instilled in me a general lack of care for the law. I'm very fortunate that I figured out on my own how much I didn't want to get into legal trouble.

She didn't have any clue how to manage money, still doesn't. Every penny she made would be spend on going out to eat, going and buying random crap we didn't need.

Mentally, she liked to manipulate my emotions. If I made her upset in anyway she would just stop talking to me for hours on end and I wold try and ask her what she was mad about and she wouldn't tell me. She had an explosive temper, she screamed and cussed at me and my sister a LOT. She didn't hit often, and when she did it was usually just a smack or a pop. Belt or switch on rare occasions. I don't feel like I was really physically abused, but emotionally and mentally I feel like I may have been.

She would fight with my grandparents on occasion, take me and my sister, and go try and live in the car for a few days, and always end up going back to my grandparents.

She was not the worst mother ever, but she had a lot of severe mental issues, and she passed plenty of them onto me. Later in life she became an alcoholic, after she finally got caught and convicted of a felony charge.

I'm married and doing moderately well now, and it's difficult to know my mom. I don't like being around her, she makes me feel gross. At the same time, I love her and know I'm going to regret all of this avoidance.

/r/AskReddit Thread