This is gonna get buried but I cut my dad out when I got pregnant.
Growing up, my dad abused me and my sister in every way, shape, and form. For instance he once choked my sister against the fridge because she “slammed” the microwave door. He also took inappropriate pictures of me as a kid. Once I got chased through a hotel we were staying at at 10 pm because I wanted to eat dinner. I got out of being struck when he caught up to me because I was in the lobby and there were people at the front desk.
Anyway, we had gone no contact for a year before COVID and he demanded answers. Trying to give him the benefit of the doubt I told him (minus the pictures) to which he responded “I’m sorry you don’t agree with my parenting style” and said I need to find a way to accept him because he was my dad.
Soon after I became pregnant with my family’s one and only grandchild and at first things were ok... until my husband and I moved. Suddenly he had every excuse under the moon to know what our new address was (part of the reason we moved) I got almost daily semi-threatening calls demanding to know my new address even going as far as saying he was going to corner me at my new job. My husband and I were scared for our lives. Well, after another nasty voicemail on my birthday I had enough.
I called and told him to shut up and listen cause it was my turn to talk. I told him I’d never feel safe having him around my upcoming child and that he was in no way ever going to meet them. At first he asked me for examples of his behavior, but then cut me off and gave about 5 examples of his own bad deeds himself? I then brought up the pictures and he demanded ME to produce proof. Like I would have the photos? Anyways, long story short I told him if he tracked me down I’d call the cops who live about 5 minutes away.
Haven‘t heard from him since. Been about 8 months now? Dealing with abusers before though, I realize I got extremely lucky with him not making right on his threats. Thankfully he holds onto grudges real hard so I probably won’t ever hear from him again.