The earliest I can remember contemplating and actually giving serious thought to performing the action of suicide (i.e. knife in hand or something of the sort) dates back to when I was about eight years old, give or take a few years. However, while I attempted so many times to make the final slice, sobbing with tears every time, I never was able to end my own life. I could wish of my death so frequently and so strongly, but yet I could never perform the action myself. It's been several years since I have had an actual thought of committing suicide and now I would consider myself quite optimistic in life! You have to create your own reality and thrive off of the smallest amounts of positivity. This reality is based on perspective; constant adjustment will help perfect your understanding of positivity and its role in your life! Finally, I would say the main reason that my depression ceased was that during my late senior year in high school, after a mental breakdown from being sober for a few weeks from a variety of substances, I realized that my positivity was something that I controlled. After that epiphany, I have never loved anything more than my own life and the people that I share it with. The universe speaks to us in wonderful ways. "Once in a while you get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at things right".

I write this not to rant about my life and my experiences, pledging for sympathy; I write this for any curious individuals who themselves are contemplating suicide at rather frequent periods. Life is not easy for anyone, everyone - even the wealthy - have difficulties in life! As human beings, we all fear death, regardless of what anyone may falsely believe. Once that moment of death closes in and we realize that the one thing that we have loved and known our entire lives is slipping away, we definitely will wish that we could relive those moments and rejoin our loved ones in this reality. Human beings have always intrinsically feared the unknown and we always will.