This stuck out to me.

"bring him back on track as it may be his last opportunity"

I do not think she is lying from her perspective.

I think she is saying this because this is how she really thinks. She thinks she is dying of cancer, and this is her one, last chance to force her son into doing "what he needs to to succeed".

A lot of really crazy, manipulative, but still loving, moms seem to always have the same nightmare -- after they die, their kid will lose their way. They will no longer be alive to pick them up if they fail. That seems to terrify them so much.

In Asian culture (And Western, too, but I guess a lot of people in America don't like it), a lot of success is through connections. To many people, their "connections" are there to make their childrens' lives easier. If their child ever needs help in the work place -- they know someone with an "in". It is one of the most "valuable" things a parent can "do" for their child, foster these connections for when their child may need them.

Her "connections" are mostly, very likely, in China. And her son does not know them. If she dies without him getting to know these people, without knowing who to go to in case of anything, without ever meeting them -- that is a HUGE "waste" of a lot of her effort for him. And these people, without knowing him, without seeing him care for his mother and being a "good, loyal son" probably won't want to help him out of he ever needs it.

So yeah. She's manipulative. But I think she's honestly scared FOR HER SON at this point.

She was likely raised with this being "how the world works". Many parents, even when their kids are in their thirties and forties, still go out of their way to make sure they "know the right people". Not being there, not being able to "guide him" -- it's terrifying if that's how you view the world, isn't it? Your baby going out there without you -- not having someone to show them the way if need-be.

A lot of people are saying he'll be disowned -- and yeah, there's always a chance of that. But I think if he takes the time to realize that, despite this seeming super crazy, his mother is probably really SCARED FOR HIM and NOT just being selfish from her perspective or pulling some "Show me you're loyal!!" card -- he'll probably have a much more fruitful talk with her if she gives him the chance.

I don't know. I'm also white with an Asian fiance -- his mother also had cancer and constantly pulls the "I'm going to drop dead" card on him. But she doesn't do it out of pure selfishness. She loves him -- she loves him a lot. But the way she views the world and how love should be shown is different from how he thinks it should, and it causes a lot of friction, now and again. She views these "opportunities" and "connections" as ways to show her love -- so if he rejects her lessons, rejects meeting these people, rejects doing things for her where it could lead to them meeting him and becoming "his" connections through her -- she sees it as a rejection of love and a sign of disrespect.

She's also Chinese, if that helps, though she's Vietnam-born Chinese.

I don't know. I just feel sad about this situation, rather than thinking the mom is a huge bitch. It isn't like most Asian kids are loyal to their parents only through fear and intimidation or something. It always makes me so sad when everyone instantly jumps to that, without trying to give both sides the benefit of the doubt and trying to figure out WHY manipulation is being used, if it is.