I don't get this - if your wife needs things to be in such a specific manner, why isn't she taking care of the restaurant reservation and stuff? Why is she trying to make you read her mind? Is she usually like this? Because that's unreasonable and if she needs or wants something from you, she needs to communicate with you directly, not let you do X, realize X isn't what she meant and then unreasonably get angry at you for not reading her mind.

Your wife doesn't seem to care much about your feelings here. Yeah, you may be a bit aloof and stressed, but that's no excuse for her to treat you so badly.

I think you should offer to get couples counseling to improve the communication between you guys. It's clear that neither of you are willing to try and talk to each other about what each of you need out of the marriage.