My parents were divorced and didn’t like each other so suffice to say the communication wasn’t all that good. I bounced around a lot between them ages 13-16 before getting emancipated, so communication was even worse. I was really depressed and anxious, basically just dealing with the shit that was going on in my life which was a lot for my age. I told my mom I was feeling like killing myself might be an option.

Cue me being taken to the hospital, drugged with Ativan before I can even talk to a doctor or nurse past basic info (height, weight, etc), admitted to in-house therapy (transferred 3 time while completely drugged because my parents couldn’t settle on a place good enough), and while in the facility for a month I’m placed on 5 different drugs and introduced to the idea that I can manipulate doctors into giving me the drugs I want.

I get out with the stipulation that I should monitor my medications and adjust them as needed. Well my parents don’t communicate so that doesn’t happen as doctor appointments aren’t made. I stay on a very high dose cocktail of uppers, downers, and tranquilizers to give me a chemical cycle of emotion and sleep 24/7 for over a year.

One day I walk into a new therapist who notices I’m on 300 mg dose of Trazodone a day as a 14 year old on top of all the other prescriptions she found ridiculous . She starts to suggest weaning me off but it’s too late I’m hooked I just don’t want anyone to know. I start doing my best to manipulate her into seeing that I should still be on them, I mean that had worked with every other doctor that far. She saw through me and my parents half assed attempts to be anything but bystanders to what the doctors had been prescribing me.

I continued going to her for years and with her help got emancipated from my parents. While I don’t wholly blame my parents for understanding what was happening, if anything it was just negligence not malicious, but the doctors I take issue. My formative years I spent on high doses of addictive drugs and was put in and out of rehab because some dipshit doctor from the very beginning told my mom that I was “an extreme danger to herself and your family” without even talking to me that very first visit to the emergency room that started it all. His inattentiveness to me as child and what I was saying over what my mom was hysterically spouting directly led me to the addictions I struggle with today.

While at the end of the day any decision I make is my own and it’s my responsibility to fight my addiction, I know where and when my addiction formed and it was because of the over medication of a child that still happens way to often to this day. If you are a parent listen to your children and watch what the doctor is doing. You don’t need to helicopter but understanding that you are getting quality care consistently for your child that might not be the most effective at communication is key to treating any mental illness they may or may not be dealing with.