I (19M) have been hanging out with this girl (27) for a couple months now, and today was her birthday. In the days leading up to it, she was talking to me about getting a cake, barbecuing shrimp, etc. You know... celebrating.
But then yesterday, she got into a fight with one of her friends and was in a sad, sour mood. She told me she didn't really feel like celebrating her birthday. I wanted her to feel better though, so I told her if she ever needed to talk or vent, I'm available.
Then today, I texted her happy birthday and left her a couple of flowers with a happy birthday note on her porch. She never texted back or anything, which isn't like her, so I went over to her place to see if everything was all good, and before she even answered the door, I could hear her drunk ramblings. Although I didn't realize she was drunk until she let me in and I saw how FUCKED UP this girl was. Seriously, this is a normally shy, calm sweet girl and she was talking like a hood rat gangsta ready to start swinging in a fight. Yeah, THAT kind of drunk. I could see a couple mini-size bottles of fireball having been left empty on the counter.
This kinda perturbed me a bit. First of all, knowing that she's been in a fight and feeling down, not to mention how she was rambling on about trauma while drunk, made me think she was drowning her sorrows in alcohol, which made me legitimately scared for her. This is exactly how alcoholics are born, and she's a really sweet and smart girl, I don't want her to slip into alcoholism. I remember when I was a little kid (pre-age 10), my mom used to always overdue it to the point of being ready to puke drunk, very similarly to this girl, and it was just about as fun looking at her tonight as it was seeing my mom puking her ass off after getting home from the bar when I was 7yo.
When I came, there was also a coworker of mine (45M), who said he came 5 minutes before me because she called him to come hang out. She used to work at my current workplace, and my coworkers are how me and this girl met each other. Anyways, he seemed to be just as concerned as I was, but he also seemed to be more entertained/amused by her drunkenness rather than disgusted the way I was. He flat out told me "don't give her weed, she'll puke for sure".
Then this coworker of mine decided that she needed to go out for a drive so she could scream (understandable). Initially, I wanted to come, cause that kinda sounded like fun, and they were both initially down for it. But eventually he decided to tell me that he wanted to take her out alone to let her scream, and then "talk some sense into her" (his exact words). He also told me that he'd bring her back home after a while and let me "take over" being with her.
At first, the idea seemed sensible and I agreed to it. The girl was actually upset to see me leave and was doing the old "I love you man" drunk schtick, but I know better than to take a drunk seriously. What actually ended up happening was that they never returned home, and neither one of them answered when I texted or called to see how things were going, if she was alright, etc.
I was seriously worried at first, but now I think they were just trying to get rid of me and playing me for a fool.
Here's what I theorize REALLY happened: she didn't wanna have me around or hang out with me for whatever reason, so that's why she didn't respond to my texts. I came to find her fucked up as hell, but when I expressed my concerns, she and my coworker thought I was being a drag and decided to try to get rid of me. Biggest evidence was that the flowers I left her were sitting nicely on her TV stand, meaning she got them, but didn't even have the decency to say thank you.
Let me tell you though, if he really wanted to talk some sense into her, I don't know why he didn't wanna bring me with them. I probably would've yelled in her face and given her a well-deserved scolding alongside him.
It's weird because these two have been nothing but really cool to me in the past, but this just feels dirty to me. Either I'm seriously misinterpreting things right now, or they're being fake friends.
I texted both of them with the question about whether or not they were trying to get rid of me, and told them if the answer was yes then FUCK the both of them, but if not, then sorry for being so upset and rude. Still haven't gotten an answer.