Can I just say that I think I relate to this too? I don't consider myself a control freak, and in general I don't think I'm too concerned with what other people do. Like you, my problem is that when I ask someone to do something, they either don't do it how I expected them to do it, or they don't do it at all.

Example: One week, I reminded my mom (college student, live at home with her) every day for about 6 days to not forget to grab Dr. Pepper on her way home from work. By Friday, she still hadn't done it.

Alternatively: One year for my birthday I asked my aunt for a string of blue lights to hang in my room because fuck the dark. I'd meant like a single string of the kind of lights you plug in and hang on your house around Christmas, and I thought she knew that, but I guess maybe I hadn't been clear, because what she got me was an ornamental ball of blue lights and two little battery-powered strings. Not really bright enough to serve the purpose I'd intended.

Things like this are why I consider my "life motto" to be "If you want something done right, you have to do it yourself."