Sorry for the length but there's a lot to this story. My mom's second husband (who she had my two younger siblings with) molested me throughout high school and possibly longer. I did not suspect anything was going on until we went on an RV trip as a family and I woke up one night to him leaning over me and my sheets pushed off of me. I freaked out and didn't sleep the rest of the trip, but I fell into denial and pushed it out of my head because I was terrified that he would do something to my mom if I told her (he was incredibly controlling - monitoring her phone calls and internet usage and constantly accusing her of cheating and threatening her).
One week, him and my mom were fighting once again. My mother was incredibly depressed from being in this relationship and being emotionally abused, I was scared my siblings would grow up in a horrible environment, and I wanted to make my mother finally leave him, so I called my older sister (who has the same dad as me) who was in college and confessed to her what I thought had happened on the RV trip. She freaked out and told me she was telling my mom, so I went to stay with my grandparents. My sister told my mom she had something to tell her but wanted her away from him before she told her. My mom told him, "The girls have something to tell me but won't until I get out of the house with the kids. I'm leaving tonight with them" and left to stay with her dad.
Looking back, I know that he knew what was going to be told to my mom. My sister told my mom, who shut down emotionally. She told my sister she needed time to think. The next day, she went over to the house to talk to him and found him dead in the bed, having swallowed all of his heart medication. The worst day of my life was watching my mother sit down my half-brother and half-sister and tell them their dad was dead, telling them he had a heart attack.
A month after his funeral, my mother got a call from the police asking her to come to the station. They told her they had found a buried laptop behind the recreation center. When they searched it, there were dozens of videos of me getting dressed in my room when I got out of the shower, along with videos of me sleeping. There could be others but that's all my mom told me.
I had no idea that he had been doing these things and was sick and mortified. For two years I suffered from nightmares where he came back, and I begged someone to make him go away but no one listened to me. I guess it could sound like my darkest secret, but it was really his, and it's a secret I am keeping from my little sister and brother. I worry about when my siblings get older (as they were both a little less than 10 when it happened) and start asking questions. I have decided to keep this from them forever as I don't want them to suffer knowing the truth about their dad. However, it's incredibly hard not to grimace or feel sick when they say his name or ask me something about him.