You want to hear me bitch?

Okay.

I want to bitch about the fact that finding a job is a catastrophic situation for me. I have a 2 year college diploma and a 4 year university degree, I'm a reasonably intelligent guy that loves strategic and business analysis but I can't even get an interview. I consider myself an incredibly hard worker and a quick learner but I can't get a chance to prove myself. So I take shitty jobs with not vertical movement which doesn't help. It bugs me that people will say "you're just not looking hard enough" because bullshit! I have gone through thousands of job postings, I have gone directly to companies, I have done the legwork. I had an opportunity that was "guaranteed" and a manager of the branch and her boss were both trying to get me into the position and I STILL LOST IT to someone WITH A JOB ON THE SAME FUCKING FLOOR! Someone making $25 bucks an hour took over an entry level job over bullshit politics. I finally got a job with some prospects that I really enjoyed and four months in the company (Target) walks out of the country. So now the opportunity to work in corporate or management is gone and despite the fact I probably would have moved up there's no evidence of that so it looks like another dead end job on my resume.

So now, despite the fact that I really do want to achieve something with my life, I can't because I'm in this spiral of depression where I want to write a book but I can't bring myself to type because my brain tells me there's no fucking point to because it will go nowhere and then I waste hours on either the job search or just dicking around.

Then I have to deal with being 24 and living at home and feeling like I have nothing and that just makes it worse.

So here I am. Tired all the time for no reason, depressed, feeling like I'm going nowhere, and trying to save up money so I can move but past me made really shitty financial decisions so I'm buried in fucking debt so I can't justify spending money in an attempt to make money (as in paying to have professional quality writing to publish or a website), but if I move on that money without a job I'll end up homeless because of you know, food and rent and shit.

And to top it all off I hate noise which is a FUCKING CONSTANT! I have heavy breathing and a dripping faucet at this moment and my blood pressure is about to burst my eyes like little itty bitty watermelons.

Have I bitched enough for you?

I actually feel a little better. Thanks.