Also about being popular, I have rejected all advances. It's been easy except for one. That's just because he was super funny and charming. We turned out as decent friends, but I keep a distance. But I did a great job through and through and haven't done anything I'd be ashamed of or not let him see. I've been very faithful.

The thing is I think about a lot of things. I just don't have anywhere to talk about it because I'm isolated without any close friends. I think it's reasonable to think about the other men, because I will be single and in the past I've always had to keep a lot of distance from people or else they ask me out.

The relationships been unique. I appreciate it because at times it hasn't had many ups. I have to be positive about the things it does have, and being unique is one of them. Things are really more stable now. But that's also ridiculous because it's about to all be over. Or not. I just don't know. If I could go back I'd want to stay. But if I chose to stay we would've have connected like this. ಠ_ಠ