I completely agree with you. I believe that as well. I have worked very hard in my life to be a high quality person. I have a masters degree. Have worked at a few very nice universities. Before this darkness i was a yoga instructor and super fit. My childrens father has a degree and georgous green eyes and blonde hair that I wanted to pass down to my children. I have boy/girl twins that were in modeling when they were younger and have academic excellence awards and are in the gifted class and so was I. I live in a good community. Me and my kids run/bike/trampoline every day to stay fit.

I feel like i want my life back. I want to be normal and enjoy all the things i worked so hard for i spent years in college getting a degree. I have no job and no good references ive been fired because you cant work with little kids with a brused up face. My neighbors think im a criminal because the cops showed up. The schools been involved cps has been involved. The mail man knows my family knows my kids know, i havcurecord now. He took about 40,000 from me ruined my credit and totaled the car he had me buy him.

Im angry that these issues are so big that it limits the quality guy I want and one that is equal to the amount of hard work I have put into myself and my children.

But at this point i dont know what quality is. I mean sometimes i see a guy that is unbelivebally hot and rich and loves kids and is so fun. That guy is never single. I have no idea where i stand with guys either i dont know how to balance those first two paragraphs in my head. I dont know what level of guy to go after. i freak out the normal ones with my story. And the weirdo ones dont care if I say weird things. Like its normal to the abusers because thats how women act around them their stories seem normal and so you feel normal. Out of fear. He abused a lot of other girls. I would try to keep them safe.