The public stoning was inevitable. I am off. I know. That’s why I asked. I feel really bad about it.

Someone suggested I read a book about receiving love.

I do have a genuine problem of accepting small favors from people. At work, at a friends, at my in-laws. If someone offers me something I don’t want.

For years my MIL would offer me a glass of soda when I ate with them. I don’t drink soda, so I would thank her, and decline, and grab some water instead. Then she started buying seltzer. I was perfectly content with drinking water. But she insisted because she felt as though water was not welcoming enough…I guess? So I drank seltzer for years and years despite hating the stuff. Eventually she bought me a soda stream to make my own seltzer. I thanked her. Took it. And haven’t touched it for years. I feel bad because she wasted her money on me.

At work it’s become really a nuisance. They’ll get pizza. Ask if I want a slice. I don’t like eating at work…so I’ll pass. I’ve been doing this for years, so they now make fun of me that they’ve never see me eat at work.

My boss once made me sit in the lunch room as everyone talked and ate pizza. It felt like less being punished.

It frustrating, I understand why it’s not socially acceptable. But it’s not like I’m rude about it. I politely tell them I’m okay, thank you for offering and return to work. I’ll interact and laugh with them all day, but because I won’t eat with them. It’s a problem. What am I suppose to tell them? I don’t want to fill up on food at work because I fast, and pizza gives me gas, and I’d rather not have to keep running to the bathroom to fart for the rest of the day?

I feel as though the more assertive I am, the more I come off as an asshole. But why should anyone be forced to eat or drink or accept gifts they won’t use?

A polite decline should be socially acceptable.