I have some fun news for you bro.

I'm a union electrician and this whole vagisil thing is child's play. I have in my career done the following:

• Handed apprentices tampons
• Thrown handfuls of tampons at peoppe
• thrown maxi pads at people
• Dipped a tampon in red sharpie and then asked people "hey did you lose this?"
• Told an apprentice to stop being "butter-soft, bitch-made prolapsed vaginas"
• Told coworkers to shut their cock holsters
• Told my boss to suckle my ball bag and to stop being a rooster hoover
• Told an apprentice that he would "make a great wife for some lucky guy."
• Told an apprentice he was "as soft as a tube sock stuffed with pussy lips."
• Told my boss's boss "hey do you want to go to the gay bar after work? I'll buy you a drink if you let me push your stool in"
• Told a project manager "that he needed get a glass stomach since he had head so far up his ass he can't see what he's doing"
• Told another apprentice "if he wanted to keep being a pussy, he can get one for about 10 grand and a flight to Thailand."
• Told and apprentice that he "has a real fuckable mouth and hes my favorite Twink."
• Told my boss to "draw me a fucking map so I can find the point of what he's talking about."
• Told many many apprentices "hit with your purse" when trying to use a hammer.
• Told many many people "what's your fuckin problem, you want me to call my sister and have her show you how to do it?"
• Told one boss "I bet your family tree is a cactus if everyone on it is as much of a prick as you are."

That's just what I can remember.

You live in a hug box. Your view of things is skewed because you view life through the anus shaped lens of Twitter blue check marked genetic dead ends.

Your opinions aren't your own and you just regurgitate things you've heard like the world's most obnoxious talking bird.

Men talk to each other like this everyday. Not "real men" just men. That's bro culture. That's the kind of male friendship that you are incapable of having because you take offense to every minor sleight. every insipid, meaningless, petty remark you make it your mission to find a way to take issue with.

I'm going to tell you what I tell apprentices with this attitude "don't be such a bitch bro, you need a tampon?"