Well, as with all Reddit unprofessional advice, you can take it or leave it.

For what it's worth, my parents used the "Do to know how good you have it?" spiels sparingly, so I never resented it. It was more often then not a wake-up call regarding my behavior.

And I'm a fan of as logical a consequence as you can conceive of to reinforce desired behaviors. If just the most basic, humane, logical reinforcements & punishments doesn't work in your parenting, then by all means, leave it by the wayside. But it's been a useful strategy that helps me know that, for example, I'm not standing idly by while the kid in my care acts like a jerk and doesn't heed the most immediate consequence of their victim saying, "That hurts my feelings."

But I am curious what your strategies are for cultivating intrinsic motivations that are only directly related to the desired behaviors. Or how you get by with "never telling a kid what to do".