YTA though apparently I am in the minority!

You should not be treating your kids so differently.

Unless there is a very strong reason for it – – kid one thrives here, kids to thrives there – – your kids should have the same opportunities and be in the same school.

You are teaching your daughter that she is lesser than your son, and that you care more about his welfare.

She might thrive at that school and find her own skills.

Of course their paths may diverge after college and he may become highly successful and she may be less so. Or...vice versa. But treating them so differently now sets up a lifetime of resentment and distance.

This happened in my family. One of us got a scholarship to an excellent private school. Our parents were not upper middle class. They squeezed, scraped, and with help from family members sent both of us there. And didn’t tell us. So...we were just siblings/peers. And my sibling is still one of my favorite people in the world.