NTA, I don’t really get why so many people are saying YTA.

Could you handled it better? Sure. Could she have waiting for another time to bring this up? Yep.

If she has resentment about her childhood and what type of dad you were. She should bring it up instead of letting it burst out in a situation where you are trying to condone your anxious wife.

She’s 28 years old, if she needs to be able bring up things that are bothering her to have a open and honest conversation about it to get resolution. Otherwise things are always gonna bother her and situations like this will always happen to her.

Maybe as a step forward you can reach out to her and start the conversation. Maybe invite your son as well and just try to resolve all these things they may be feeling.