YTA. The thing that got me is that you said you're so useless probably because your parents helped you out so much in the past... The entire post doesn't seem like you're taking much if any responsibility and are laying it at your parents' feet, specifically your mother's. Perhaps they shouldn't have coddled you so much, sure, but as a grown up, it's your responsibility to, ya know, be responsible. If you don't know how, it's up to you to learn. Just like it's up to you to figure out care for your children and not just expect free childcare because you (wrongly) assumed grandparents doing this much was the norm. And no, this thread isn't debating whether people with chronic illnesses or disabilities should have children. It's people saying it was irresponsible of you to make the choices you did and drawing on their own experiences with illnesses, disabilities, and being parents (or choosing not to be). It's not like you can retroactively return the kids to the hospital because free childcare wasn't part of the parenting package, though, so it might be best to look into paid childcare and give your poor parents a break.