Brides want to feel special, especially on their day. I know everyone is kind of bashing your friend but I don't think it's an "asshole" sort of thing. I do hope she doesn't let a dress ruin a friendship especially when she'll most likely be wearing it first. (I assume her wedding is before yours?) But maybe she wants your dress to be special and unique too.

I also don't necessarily agree that just because she hasn't started planning that means the dress shouldn't be "hers." You know?

I don't think you're an AH either. You really do feel special in it and it can't be helped. It's a dress and I think later on in the future you both will laugh about it.