My house is by no means a show home, but it is clean the vast majority of the time because I feel unsettled when it's not and there no amount of "getting used to it" or lowering my standards that is going to change that. A few thoughts though:

I keep more than half of my kids toys stored away at any given time. We typically use big tubs and rotate them when she seems to be getting bored with the ones she has out. It's less overwhelming choices for her and less mess for me. On my to do list today is the pre-Christmas toy clean out to make space for the impending new things.

I also have her clean up the set of blocks before she gets out her cars, unless she's going to play with them together. We clean everything up before lunch/nap/whatever. I might help a little, but she's completely capable of doing it herself at 2.5.

I prep as much of lunch and dinner as I possibly can in the morning while we do breakfast. Then the kitchen gets a solid cleaning, dishwasher unloaded, everything put away and that's that. I can usually do all of it before 9am. The rest of the day it's just making sure dishes get in the dishwasher and cleaning up little things as we go.

My daughter reliably naps two hours. I do all of my serious cleaning for the first hour and take the second one "off." This is usually when I eat lunch and run on the treadmill (not usually in that order)

And the cereal thing. Ugh. It's frustrating. But think of all the things you DID remember. Plus, I think your husband is perfectly capable of picking up some cereal if it's that important. If he's not, then he has bigger things to worry about.