The #metoo movement scares me. I do feel for every woman who has been sexually assaulted, I am sure it is terrible and I can see the impact in my own fiance who was assaulted earlier in her life.
However, the ease of anonymously reporting someone using a name and a simple hashtag can lead to all sorts of incredibly serious consequences. I was once falsely accused of rape and I know exactly what consequence it has.
My girlfriend and I were trying to get past her recently cheating on me with her ex. A bit after the entire event we were sitting on the couch watching TV and I suggest sex and she says no. We then proceeded to brush our teeth and head into the bedroom.
A few days later I visited her place and her roommate is up in arms about what happened. I then find a blog she had been writing that is documenting her entire experience dating with multiple guys. I found out then that she was actually dating like 5 guys and documenting each date and how she was fitting them all into her schedule like a jigsaw puzzle. Sure enough, the day after my failed attempt at restarting the relationship was a post about how I was really forceful and insisted on sex. The entire blog post faded to black with her being scared and me being forceful. She never actual said rape in the blog post but it was implied.
I immediately contacted a lawyer as it looked really REALLY bad. I saved the entire site and am still holding onto it to this day (4 years later). She never actually went to the police with her story and I know exactly why she did not. I had a camera in my living room. Just a doggy cam to watch my cats and dogs as they sleep on the couch during the day and watch out the window to where my car was parked. She knew it existed as there was no attempt to disguise the fact it was there. I usually turn it off when guests are over but I had forgotten this time and it did catch us casually getting ready for bed as we walked through the house picking up dishes and stuff. There was absolutely no way what she claimed happened. The only time we spoke after I found out what she wrote was to say we would never see each other again.
Prior to me she had already accused two people of sexual assault on her to the police and I am convinced that the only reason she did not this time is she knew how much of a lie it was and that there could be some video proving her wrong. My lawyer said I really lucked out but I still worry that someday she will just decide to bring it all up again 20 years down the line.